Bullying Prevention Workplace Bullies TV Invterview

Bully Prevention Expert Margaret Ross: Guest Focus On Atlanta



>> KEISHA: Hi, welcome back to Focus Atlanta.
Again, I’m your host Keisha Williams.
In this segment, we are going to talk a little bit
about our kids.
But you know what?
Some of the things that the kids go through right now
like bullying in school.
It goes through life
I’ve had a couple of bullies at the job
you know to tell the truth about it.
So if we stop it, when it really gets started
we’ll be lots better off.
I’m here with MARGARET ROSS.
MARGARET ROSS, thanks for coming on the show.
>> MARGARET ROSS:  My pleasure Keisha.
>> KEISHA: How did you get into working with antibullying techniques?
>> MARGARET ROSS: Because we work in our foundation with schools
um, in a positive label program
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: What we found almost accidentally
is that as we put
kind words and kind actions into schools
we were measuring it pre and post
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: We founds that bullying was cut in half.
>> KEISHA: You found. Ok. Nice. Good way to do it.
What age ranges do you work with?
>> MARGARET ROSS: Elementary and middle school
>> KEISHA: Perfect because that’s really where it all begins.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Oh, it really does.
>> KEISHA: And unfortunately, like I said,
it doesn’t always end.
>> MARGARET ROSS: No it doesn’t as a matter of fact
about 35% of your viewers go to workplaces where they yell
and then when you add on top of that
the people who do the bullying that is the flame male
cutting you down at the meetings.
>> MARGARET ROSS: during your presentations, it goes on and on.
>> KEISHA: It goes on and on.
>> MARGARET ROSS: So, but, you know, with kids, it’s the replacement behavior cause kids have to succeed.
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: and um,
>> KEISHA: You have to find something else for them to do.
>> MARGARET ROSS: To do.  Exactly.
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Anyone who works with children knows that
all you have to say is don’t do this
>> KEISHA: aw, and they do it.
>> MARGARET ROSS: they do it.
Quickly as they can.
So what you have to do instead of
instead of focusing on don’t.
>> KEISHA: Don’t.
>> MARGARET ROSS: We focus on do
and because it feels really good
and we require that the adults change first.
>> KEISHA: Oh.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Which is the biggest challenge.
>> KEISHA: Huge.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Huge challenge.
>> KEISHA: You’re right.
>> KEISHA: Turn the old dog into having new spots.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Yeah, sure, I mean the kids
especially like in middle schoolers.
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Middle schoolers will do anything
as long as everyone is doing it
>> KEISHA: Yeah.
>> MARGARET ROSS: But if an entire middle school staff
does the Casey 3 program
>> KEISHA: Uh, huh.
>> MARGARET ROSS: With the students.
We renormed cool.
>> KEISHA: Wow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Can you imagine having kind be cool?
>> KEISHA: That would be very cool.
>> KEISHA: [laughter]
>> MARGARET ROSS: It is when kind is cool because
cool kids then have to do the kind behaviors
>> KEISHA: Uh, huh.
>> MARGARET ROSS: To maintain their status in the school.
>> KEISHA: As, as cool.
>> MARGARET ROSS: As cool, you just must.
>> KEISHA: I love it.
>> MARGARET ROSS: And, um, the problem is just getting bigger
not smaller, unfortunately,
although we are working as hard as we can.
>> KEISHA: Right.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Like every day half of Georgia school childen get off a bus
where bullying happens.
>> KEISHA: Wow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: They walk into a school,
>> KEISHA: Um, hum.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Middle school where 8 out of 10 of the kids tell us
>> KEISHA: Problem.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Bullying happens there.
Half of elementary students tell us it’s a problem there.
And then cyberbullying is on top of it.
>> KEISHA: Oh my gosh.
>> MARGARET ROSS: It’s not replacing anything.
>> KEISHA: Oh, I hadn’t even thought of that aspect of it.
I mean, they are just getting into another realm
that we didn’t have to deal with then.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Oh yeah, right.  We didn’t have it at all.
>> KEISHA: Right.
>> MARGARET ROSS: As a matter of fact, half of Georgia teens
are part of cyberbullying.
>> KEISHA: Oh, gosh.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Girls win. You know, cyberbullying is a lot about words.
>> KEISHA: Wow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: And you know because it is
unkind taunting, teasing, ridiculing
through email, text and those kind of things.
>> KEISHA: Um, hum.
>> KEISHA: It continues in the different way.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Just in a different way.
>> KEISHA: So what can parents do
to kind of help you, you know,
cause it’s great if it’s reinforced in
both place, you know.
>> KEISHA: You know what I mean?
>> MARGARET ROSS: Exactly, exactly.
If we are going to talk about, um, cyberbullying
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: When I asked the Georgia Teen Leadership Group,
just two weeks ago,
tell me how we should solve it?
>> KEISHA: Right.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Ok.  They said parents should tell their kids it’s wrong.
Isn’t that something?
>> KEISHA: Just like that.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Just like that. Parents should tell their kids it’s wrong
and why it’s wrong.
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Ok.  There should be consequences for the behavior.
>> KEISHA: Now, ok.  That brings up another question.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Um, hum.
>> KEISHA: Is part of the problem
that kids don’t realize that they are bullying.
Like they don’t recognize that what they are doing is
quote unquote bullying.
>> KEISHA: Like calling this person this bad name
or whatever or texting
>> KEISHA: they don’t, ok, ok. They don’t follow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Exactly. As a matter of fact, they are with you
if you say are you bullying, ok.
>> KEISHA: Um, hum.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Many will say no.
>> KEISHA: No, right.
>> MARGARET ROSS: But if you say
>> KEISHA: Do you.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Do you.  Has your friend received unkind emails?
>> KEISHA: Wow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Has anybody said things, put pictures of you without your permission?
>> KEISHA: Wow.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Are kids on the bus saying mean things to each other?
They’ll say yes.
>> KEISHA: I gotcha.
Well, now give us, um, some more information
about your website so they can get
more information there.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Yes, yes they certainly can.
Kamaron.org. K-A-M-A-R-O-N dot org
>> KEISHA: Perfect.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Ok. If they type in, they see Bullying Solutions.
>> KEISHA: Ok.
>> MARGARET ROSS: On the home page there is a brochure
about the school program.
>> KEISHA: Um, hum.
>> MARGARET ROSS: I’m hoping that some people will feel so passionate
about after seeing this, your show.
>> KEISHA: Good. That would be great. [laughter]
>> MARGARET ROSS: We want a program in our school
>> KEISHA: That’s right. That’s right.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Or I’m hoping that maybe if there is a company
that will say we want to sponsor
>> KEISHA: Sponsor a school program
>> MARGARET ROSS: They want to sponsor an elementary school
and buses in Atlanta.
>> KEISHA: Yeah, definitely
>> MARGARET ROSS: Let’s do something for Atlanta.
One of the side benefits, Keisha, is that
um, the schools that do the program
get extra days and weeks of teaching time.
Our kids deserve every chance.
>> KEISHA: Absolutely. Well, thank you MARGARET ROSS for coming on.
>> MARGARET ROSS: Oh, it was my pleasure.
>> KEISHA: Thank you for sharing all this information.
And thank you guys for tuning in and I hope
you go to the website.
If you are a parent, go to the website
because you might want to pass it on to your kids.
If you’re a teacher, this is your opportunity.
Stay tuned for more Focus Atlanta.  We’ll be back with more.

Anger and Temper Management for Business Mangers

Temper Temper. Ten Tips for Managing your Anger

We all know the feeling of being down to our last nerve. Where do you find yourself losing your cool and your emotional balance? Is it in traffic, on the job or on the home front?  Mobile anger management is a growing challenge. Angry drivers are endangering themselves and others during the daily commute.  Temper outbursts can damage the relationships you value most. Relationships with your children and spouse.

“Keep your cool and your relationships by following this ACE approach to anger management,” says Margaret S Ross, Founder Kamaron Institute.

stress and anger management how to regain control

Ten Tips for Temper and Stress Control

Everyone knows the feeling of being down to your last frayed nerve. Whether it happens to you most frequently in traffic, on the job, the playing court or on the home front, one thing is certain – you will not be making friends or influencing others when your emotions explode all over them.  Avoid running your relationships by apply the A.C.E. approach to temper behavior management. ACE stands for Aware, Clear and Enlightened. Clear Thinking,

   Anger Management: Ten Tips To Defuse

1. Exercise: take a walk or a run, swim, lift weights, some other constructive physical activity.

2. Find ways to calm and soothe yourself:

Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself. You can also pray, listen to music, journal or do yoga.

3. Think carefully before you speak so that you don’t end up saying something you’ll regret:

Count to 20. Sing the A, B,C song to yourself.

4. Work with the person who angered you to identify solutions to the situation.

5. Use “I” statements when describing the problem to avoid criticizing or placing blame. For instance, say “I’m upset you didn’t help with the housework this evening,” instead of, “You should have helped with the housework.” To do otherwise will likely upset the other person and escalate tensions.

6. Don’t hold a grudge. Forgive the other person and ask to be forgiven. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.

7. Keep an anger log or journal to identify the kinds of situations that set you off and to monitor your reactions.

8. Step back from situation or and put yourself in that scene:

In the scene – What if you had done the same thing?  Stepping back: Carry something that serves as a reminder to step back from the situation and get your anger under control. For instance, you may want to keep a small marble, a rubber band on wrist, or a scrap of paper with your tips written down.

9. Change the dynamic: Identify two positive qualities about the person

10. Have a plan and practice, practice, practice and persist.


Persist: It may take some time and intense effort to put these tips into practice when you’re facing situations that typically send you into a rage. In the heat of the moment, it can be hard to remember your coping strategies.

Personal Finance Tips: Retirement

Financial Matters

What is long-term care? Is it part of Retirement Planning?

life style business finances for retirementLong-term care refers to the ongoing
services and support needed by people who have chronic health conditions or
disabilities. There are three levels of long-term care:

Skilled care: Generally round-the-clock care
that’s given by professional health care providers such as nurses, therapists,
or aides under a doctor’s supervision.

Intermediate care: Also provided by
professional health care providers but on a less frequent basis than skilled care.
Continue Reading Personal Finance Tips: Retirement